ponderances

What does it mean when you have this really bad feeling for no reason you can see? That happened earlier today, then not long ago after trying to talk to someone I know. It's quite stressful.

How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a Tootsie pop?

I desperately need to find another job. I'm not even making enough to pay bills presently.

I'm officially short one math/science class of graduating. Pray that I can successfully petition one of my classes that aren't currently counting toward graduation.

I feel like a failure. I cannot communicate to others what I am thinking. I have a mentor, but as wonderful as she is, even she doesn't understand me.

Cat Pic and other things

This is Alexander Mignon Ladkahm the Great. He's my wonderfully sweet 2 year old cat. I'm sorry I'm not as good a photographer as I am other things. He's quite even-tempered, easy going, and all kitten boy.

My apartment is clean!!! People can come over now. o<]:-) I do quite miss people I've not seen in awhile. They marry and disappear on me. *sniff* Anyway, I'm rather a Neopets addict. If you are ever on neopets, I'm elfweenia. Drop me a line!

To rejoin my former Sunday School class, join another, or continue to be without one. That has been my question for several months. I don't know what to do, honestly. My...heart? still cares for certain people, though logic and everyone else tell me I should have nothing to do with them. I do not understand what I do. I do that which I do not want to do and do not do that which I want to do.

not a blog

The only comment posted to this blog in the last month or so was an ad. I guess no one reads this, not that I blame them. I'm reminded of something said to me not long ago, "You're not worth the effort." I realize I'm emotionally far behind my peers. I realize that without others willing to make effort, I'll never be able to connect to others on my own. I realize there's always someone or something more important than me. I have a wonderful cat to keep me company. I suppose that must always be enough.